spirals
Wednesday, March 26th, 2008It feels like things are spiraling. I can’t get get life aligned properly so that there’s a positive feel to it. It’s lopsided. Yet I maintain my sunny optimism… mostly.
From a discussion today, I (re-)learned that actions do speak louder than words. That if someone apologizes for something yet continues to do it, their apologies are probably not sincere. So you take those with a grain of salt.
I’m going to have to deliver an ultimatum to my mom… which doesn’t feel good (and I haven’t even done it yet). I actually did set a date for her to be someplace other than my house, but she pretty much threw it back at me. I’m going to have to do it again and be prepared to have buckets of guilt, shame and manipulation dumped on my head. Over and over again.
I feel sad but okay. I know that growth requires such things as action, even sometimes pain. I still don’t like it.
Android: more blue candles. Stat.
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